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Showing posts from 2013

Happy Birthday to me, Happy Birthday to me, Happy Birthday dear....

Today is a very special day to me: I'm 30.  I feel like a grown-up and apparently there's a club to join!  

So far, I've had an amazing day!  My super great friend, C, came over last night to help me celebrate the last day of my 20s.  We were talking about how down we seem to get on our birthdays and how there is always disappointment.  She told me to expect absolutely nothing and plan for a crappy day.  What a great idea!  I expected nothing and have received breakfast at work, flowers from the most beautiful person in the world, and lunch with friends.  It's been amazing!  I've been smiling all day!

Some people make lists of things to accomplish before they are 30.  My one friend had challenged herself to complete RAKs (Random Acts of Kindness)...I think that was for her 31st.  I decided to make a simple list of 30 things I've learned in the past 30 years.  When I thought of the idea, I expected it to be funny and interesting facts and tips, but the truth is th…

Welcome back!

How is it almost November already?!  This year has been a whirlwind.  So much has happened way too fast.  
Time to sloooooowwwww it down......
I just finished reading an article about how to get back into running.  I haven't had a real run since July.  I think I really needed the break, both mentally and physically.  I think it's time to pour the wine in a sippy cup and jump back on the treadmill.

Let's go!

I don't really have a plan.  Not yet anyways!  I'd like to get back into the gym 'old school style' which I used to love: cardio followed by strength training.  I sort of quit doing this and started with the workout dvds and yoga.  Both of which I got bored with very quickly....
I want to build up my miles again and get myself in gear for half marathon training come the new year.  I'm going to run the Woody's Half Marathon, the Dinosaur 5km, and Mud Hero for sure in 2014.  I'l like to try some new races as well, like the October run in Victoria an…

I'm a Yogi.

In my August 29th post, I had stated what my goals were to get my health and fitness back on track. Eat clean everyday!Complete every workout in Focus T25 (I start on September 2)Run 10 miles a week.Spend more quality time with my family.Prepare lunches and clothing  for the kids the night before. - See more at:
It wasn't nearly as easy as I thought it would be.  I knew I shouldn't bother trying to make too big of changes over the long weekend, especially because we were away from home.  It took me a good week after that to get my "diet" (I hate that word) back on track.  My head is back in the game and I'm feeling so much better already!
Exercise wise, it's been a lot harder...

Summer, camp fires and way too much beer....

Well, here I am.  Back at where I started with my fitness and weight loss goals.  I'm rather disappointed in myself.  Especially when I see the rest of my support group's continuing success.  

Back in June, I hit my weight loss goal!  I was eating clean, exercising, and was generally happy.  I felt good and I knew I looked good which, in turn, made me feel even better.  I had finally lost 'the last 10 pounds' and was working on muscle tone, strength and endurance.

And then it all went to shit....

Camping season started and as much as I was determined to maintain my weight and continue with exercise, all it took was one Chelada and a hot dog and my ass was parked on the beach for 2 months.  I lost my muscle tone, gained back the weight, and felt heavy and gross.  I wanted to drink beer with my friends around a campfire.  I wanted to go on drunken walks down the beach.  I wanted to float on our massive party island with a jug of margaritas by my side.  Ahhh....summer...

My g…

10 years down.

This is favorite quote.  It is so true.

My husband and I have been married for 10 years this summer. I think back on my life and try to reminisce on our early years and I can honestly tell you that I don't remember them.  No, not because I was totally shit faced and wasn't on Facebook yet to look back on drunken statuses and bar pictures, but because none of it was memorable.  I didn't live my life for me. We didn't  live our life for us. I lived it the way I felt society told me I should.  I had "mom friends".  I did "mom things".  I stressed about a clean house and what my neighbors thought of our yard.  I fought with my husband because he didn't wash the car when I thought it needed it, and because his garage didn't look organized when the door was open.  We fought.  We yelled.  We swore at each other and often threatened to leave one another.  We were the definition of unhappy.  What kind of life was that?  Where were the memories?  Where…

Go away, Norman.

There is a tomcat stalking our house that is trying to violate our kitten, Penelope.  Penelope is a small kitty, 7 months old and fragile.  She does not need to stalked by Norman The Pedophile.  Go away Norman, you're not welcome here.
Ahh, but pedophile cats are persistent little assholes.  Lurking around your yard, hiding under your deck, looking into your kitchen window.  All to get a glimpse of poor, little, fragile, Penelope.

I hadn't actually seen Norman until today.  Today Norman was brave enough to face Penelope's mother (ME).  He was actually pretty cute.  I can see why Penelope is falling for him.
I suggested to my husband that we, perhaps, adopt Norman The Pedophile.  

Me: Norman is pretty cute, actually.
Husband: Who the fuck is Norman? 
Me: The Pedophile Cat
Husband:  I don't understand what's wrong with you.
Me:  We should keep him.
Husband:  We are NOT having another cat.  
Me: I'm probably going to keep him.
Husband:  Where do we keep our sporks?


Boo!  I'm back.  
I've been a little MIA.  My stupid depression hit crazy hard this summer and it took me quite a while to get it under control.  I'm finally getting my shit together after figuring out a few things that I need to do to simplify some of the things in my life.  Things are going much better now!  I have a few appointments coming up to help determine what I can do to get this under control more long term.  Oh....the battle....
So, one of the things that I decided to do make life simpler was to only focus on this one blog: The Drunk Runner.  I really don't have the time or desire anymore to have 4 different blogs running with 4 different topics, so now you're going to get them all here!  Yay for you!  Most of my content on my other "blogs" is rather pointless and contains a lot of venting, but some of them are rather funny.  While going through them, I came across this and thought I would share it with you.  I had started a blog to rant about my…

Family Fun on a Run!

It's been a super long time since I've ran due to simply not wanting to several reasons.  With the weather finally getting nice around here and the kids being done school, I figured I'd give it a shot with me running and them on their bikes.  The kids were super stoked to go!  My oldest has "ran" with me for a couple of years and absolutely loves it!  This was the first time that the small one was able to come.  He finally parted with his training wheels, so he was ready to ride and keep up to mom!  To my complete surprise, another member of the family wanted to join us: my husband! 
My husband/Big G has never really been all that interested in fitness.  He sailed through his 20s on his incredible man metabolism and good looks, but now that he's freaking old in his 30s, he's noticing that his wife is a lot hotter then him and it's time for him to do something to keep himself looking like he works out.

Drunken Jenga

My husband and I are avid game players, as well as avid drinkers.  What could possibly be better than turning Jenga into a drinking game?

Making the game takes a little bit of time.  Each block needs an instruction.  The rules below allow for 3 blocks of each rule, with 3 blank blocks.  You can leave the last 3 blank, pick your 3 favorite rules to use again, or make up 3 completely random rules!  Try to use a permanent pen that doesn't bleed too much.  Write in large block letters.  Once you have the blocks all written out, you're ready for Drunken Jenga! 

Rules of Drunken Jenga

Positivity, People.

Yesterday, a fitness account that I follow on Twitter posted this picture and I had retweeted it.  I've seen this picture a few times before and I really didn't think too much of it until I noticed today that a friend of mine had commented on it.  Her reply was "Nice use of shaming. I give it an A plus in ignorance. Working out does not always equal being fit and vice versa."  Based on this comment, I started a couple heated discussion in regards to this picture and the message that it is suggesting.To me, this picture says “ if you aren’t willing to put in the effort, then you don’t deserve the results” (which I believe to be 100% true), but to others it seems to have a much more negative message.

Eat Clean and Drink Beer

As you've all probably noticed, I haven't been blogging as much as I used to.  I've been pretty busy lately and trying to find a way to re-focus "The Drunk Runner".  I then realized that a blog name does not necessarily have to set the tone for the entire blog.  I drink and I run, but I also do a lot of other things.  Lately, my new passion has been changing my eating habits to lose weight and keep it off!!  I don't have too much to lose, and I don't aspire to be a bikini model, so it's been a lot easier than I expected.  Basically, I've been "eating clean" and drinking a ton of water.  Yep, that's it!!  Staying away from crappy, preservative filled foods; passing on heavy, unnecessary calories and opting for real meats and veggies; and being conscious of my decisions.  It feels good and is easily maintainable!  
I'm not changing my blog to tell you about how to live your life, and what foods to eat and what foods to avoid.  You …

The Pink Bitch

I noticed that I've had SIX page views today.  You were probably all waiting for my new drink recipe that I promised on Wednesday!
I'm sure that you've all heard of Beer Margaritas or Beergaritas.  Well, we've grown to greatly appreciate them.  While we were out camping this past weekend, we enjoyed a jug of Beer Margaritas with some new friends.  I went into the trailer to make another jug and tragedy struck: we were out of Limeade.  But...we had a couple cans of Pink Lemonade.  My semi-drunk self thought "what the hell....let's give it a try".  I passed on the tequila and checked the liquor cabinet for something a bit sweeter.  We were all impressed with my wicked invention!
   I present:
The Pink Bitch

Moving on.

I had intended on giving myself a one week break from blogging after the A-Z Challenge.  Apparently, I have absolutely no concept of time.  Hope everyone had a good May!
You're probably wondering how the race went.  I'm kind of wondering too.  I was drunk as shit and passed out around kilometer 9 and then woke up at Arby's.....

Let's wrap this shit up...

Yeah, yeah...I know.  I missed 4 posts  I actually missed 5, but The Capillary was nice enough to hack into my blog and post her vision for me.  I freaking loved the "suspicious activity on my account" email!  That was the greatest part!
Here's a wrap up of the A-Z challenge.  I'd write 4 separate posts, but that would just take more time and, quite frankly, I'll probably be wasted by the end of this one.  Go wine!
What I should write in regards to my Commit to be Fit Challenge: Drink water!  It's really good for you and shit.  Hydration, detoxing, blah blah blah.
Jesus could turn water into wine.  I can too!  23L of water and a $60 home made wine making kit, and BOOM!, I am Jesus!!!  Okay, fine, I'm not, but I have a shit tonne of wine and you don't. 

V is for Vision

Hi, this is The Capillary.

I've hacked this account to bring you the letter V on behalf of the Drunk Runner.

This came about during a conversation earlier today when she told me she went for a "naked run". Naturally, I had a vision of this:

What she meant was simply running with no timer or pace monitor.

Just before I say goodbye, I'd like to point out that by typing in "naked run" into Google search, all you get thousands of pictures of naked runners doing naked miles.

There is no mention of monitors.


The Capillary

U is for me.

I'm finding that I'm really enjoying this A-Z Challenge.  My Commit to be Fit Challenge has been an amazing learning experience for me.  I appreciate the knowledge and experiences I've gained in just matter of a month, but I think what I appreciate the most is being able to understand myself.  Writing 20 post on me has helped me to understand who I am a lot better.

Get up and TRY.


Start. Stop. Start.


R is for Races!  One of the best ways for a runner to get motivated is to enter a race!  My newly annual race is the Woody's RV World Half Marathon in Red Deer, Alberta.  This year will my third year running it.

Year 1/2011 ~ 2:18
Year 2/2012 ~ 2:08
Year 3/2013 ~  Goal 1: To finish strong    Goal 2: 2:05
You'll find out on May 19, 2013 how I do!

I've had a very "different" time training for this race.  It started out as training for the full marathon and realized that the full wasn't for me this year.  I'm now gearing up for the half again.  I'd like to come across that finish line very close to 2 hours, but my main goal is run a confident and strong race!  I'm very eager for our Alberta weather to smarten up and tax season to end so I can get out on the trails and get some serious miles in.  I don't have much time left!

Quitting? Hell no!

I think my post yesterday made it sound like I had given up on my April A-Z Commit to be Fit Challenge.  I'm absolutely not!
 As you can tell from this past weeks posts, this weeks has been really difficult.  I'm struggling through some very emotionally draining personal stuff.  I've only made it to the gym one time, I did not stay within my calorie limit even one day, and I have drank copious amounts of alcohol....with a with a straw!!  (We went to see Marianas Trench on Wednesday.  I LOVE stadium beer!!).  My week of not caring has not helped with the Commit to be Fit Challenge.  Friday morning weigh in was not pretty.
Oh well...moving on!

Personal Training! Woohoo!

Well, this A-Z Commit to be Fit Challenge isn't going as well as I had  hoped.  Shit.  The first 2 weeks were great, but now I have several reasons as to why I'm not doing so hot.  My number one reason: I'm freaking tired.  My real job (the thing I do when I leave the house to get a paycheck) has been very draining lately.  I'm utterly exhausted.  2 more weeks until tax season is over!
In my sadness about not accomplishing my April goals, I researched our local gyms and personal training services and booked a consultation with a trainer named Candace.  I'm quite excited about this.  I have taken a couple of weekend courses to educate myself in personal training, but I've never actually had a trainer...personally.

Ooops....I'm drunk.

I was going to write an uplifting and inspirational post about the power of optimism for my 'O' post.  
Instead I got drunk.

No to Negativity.

There's really no other way to describe this week so far than to refer to it as crappy.  It's a crappy week.  We had a ton of snow on the weekend that has decided to stick around (it's April damn it....I JUST WANT TO RUN OUTSIDE), I'm in a super bitchy mood, awful things are happening all over the world, my family is coming down with some type of  illness, and I'm losing motivation for both the A-Z Challenge and my Commit to be Fit Challenge.  Everything is just plain crappy.
So N is for Negativity.  I feel negative...and crappy.

M is for BitchyD.

This post is about me because, really, who doesn't like talking about themselves?  
I spent a significant amount of time searching the internet for a set of questions to answer about myself that didn't seem like too much work and might provide a minuscule amount of entertainment.  After viewing many websites, I finally came across this set from this blog:

Letting go.

Some people think it's holding on that makes us strong...sometimes it's letting go.
We hold on to so much that clutters our life and drags us down.  Why?  Because letting go is sometimes the hardest thing to do.
During my A-Z Commit to be Fit Challenge, I've had to focus on letting go of a lot of things.

Kick Ass.

Day 11, Letter K, and almost 5 pounds gone!  I'm kicking ass at my A-Z Commit to be Fit Challenge!!  
I'm quite certain that the next 5 pounds are going to be quite a bit tougher than the first 5, but I'm willing to do the work.

Be Inspired.

in·spi·ra·tionnoun\ˌin(t)-spə-ˈrā-shən, -(ˌ)spi-\ Definition of INSPIRATION1 a: a divine influence or action on a person believed to qualify him or her to receive and communicate sacred revelation
b: the action or power of moving the intellect or emotions
c: the act of influencing or suggesting opinions 

H is for Nelly.

Nothing gets you pumped up for a work out like a great song!
Enjoy it and work your ass off tonight!

Good choices.

Happy Monday everyone!  I hope your week is a good one!
We're on Letter G for the A-Z Challenge, and my commit to be fit post is about making good choices.
Making good choices isn't always easy for me.  Mainly, because I'm usually really drunk and not thinking about what's best for me in the long run.
You're probably thinking that I'm talking about making good diet choices and, of course, I am, but they aren't the only choices that need to be made when choosing to live a fit and healthy lifestyle.Nutrition and diet choices are, actually, probably the easiest of all them all.

The F word.

Well Fuck.  I've apparently Failed at abstaining from alcohol.  I'm just not a good non-alcoholic.  I tried it for awhile.  It's not very Fun.  Kudos to all of you who can handle not drinking.  I'm just not one of you.  
In relation to yesterday's post about doing enough and Finding a lifestyle that is maintainable, I've realized that not drinking just isn't going to work for me.  Enough is enough already....BEER ME!

I distrust camels, and anyone that can go a  week without a drink - Joe E. Lewis

enough IS enough.

I can think of many 'e' words that are relevant to my commit to be fit theme for this A-Z Challenge: energy, exertion, educate, excel...the list could go on and on.
I finally settled on the word 'enough'.  
Christmas of 2010 I was at the lowest weight I had ever been.  I remember being very happy and very, very hungry.  I was over-exercising and under-eating.  The weight didn't stay off because it wasn't a lifestyle that I could keep up with.  By summer 2011, the weight was back on.
In my commitment to be fit and my quest to lose the last 10 pounds, I will be doing enough.  
I will exercise enough and I will eat enough.  I will change my body and change my life in a healthy, and maintainable way.
When I run, I will run fast enough.  When I lift, I will lift heavy enough.  When I stretch, I will stretch far enough.  
I will, simply, do enough.

Da. Bomb. Diggity.

1.  something you say to emphasize awesomeness or amazingness,it is a new way to express AWESOME!
Dang! that girl is Da Bomb Diggity 

Let's C if this works.

DAMN IT.  Who's idea was this to change my theme?

Counting Calories.
Sometimes I count my daily caloric intake and sometimes I don't.  Sometimes I'm a little fat and sometimes I'm a lot. ........
Counting calories it is.

Feel the burn.

B is no longer for beer and I'm sad

I really should have thought this theme through a little bit more.  Words that start with B and are relative to my "commit to fit" challenge aren't the easiest to come by.  I've decided to go with "burn"  because I am already feeling it!!
On Saturday I decided to terrorize exercise my core and upper body after my run.  DOMS set in late on Sunday and after an intense work out tonight, I dread laughing.   
My commit to be fit challenge will include 3-4 strength training sessions per week in addition to my half marathon training program. 
It's time to feel the burn

Can you feel it?

A is for...

April 1st marks the beginning of the A-Z Challenge.  I didn't exactly write out a plan for this challenge because I knew what my posts would be about: alcohol.  It was kind of a no brainer.  
What I didn't expect was for my first post to be about abstaining from alcohol.  


Someone give me a damn trophy already...


I’m a really good drinker.  Like…super good.  If there were awards for good drinkers, I could win some.  Sometimes I think that maybe I should be less of a really good drinker and let someone else get the good drinker awards, but then I think “mmmm….maybe not…I’m pretty good”

My new running jam!

I just came across this song recently and can't stop listening to it! (I know, I's been out for FOREVER.  I've just recently become a Luke Bryan fan though....SO THERE).   I absolutely love the lyrics .  It will definitely be on my playlist a few times for my half marathon this year!
I wish there was an actual music video for it.  (maybe there is and I'm just THAT slow)

I just had to share!
And yes, I run to country.

Shoes > Beer

After making the decision to run the half instead of the full this year, I ran my first half-marathon training long run in my new shoes!  I've been in need of new shoes since the beginning of the training season, but due to accidentally spending all of my  money on tequiladue to small town living, it's taken me this long to actually get to the city and buy a new pair.

I tried on several different brands and styles and ended up going with my old faithful brand, Saucony.  This time I bought 2 different pairs to try .  One pair is their Virratas and the others are their new Kinvara 3s.  I ran last year in Saucony Kinvara 2s and loved them. 

Lost and Found

I came across this quote that was posted by Run The Edge.  I think it can be interpreted a few different ways.  It spoke to me as I do feel that I am losing myself while on this journey to my marathon.  I'm losing my happiness, I'm losing my relationships with my family and friends, and I'm losing my sanity. 

Keep Calm and Go For a Run...or a drink...or something like that.

I have been struggling for the past month with my running (as you can probably tell by my lack of witty posts and my decline in Twitter followers).  I've had some minor physical issues (cramps, tight IT band, tender knees), but the main problem has been my mind.  Basically, I don't have one anymore.  My 7 and 5 year old boys have ruined my brain.  They've taken out each individual brain cell and ran over if with their over-sized Tonka trucks and then picked it up and fed it to the cats.  My brain is broken.

That is all.

Better late than never!

The Capillary received a Liebster Award.  Actually, she received two.  Part of her challenge was to tag 11 followers and ask them a series of questions.  I like questions, so chose to participate. 

I didn't receive this, but it looks pretty!

Week 7

The happenings of Week 7:  

Drunk in the Mud.

On July 22, 2012 I ran my first hangover race.  The race was a 6km obstacle course called Mud Hero.  We were out camping the day before with our newly acquired Sea-doo.  Dozens of jello shots and a case of beer later, I found myself the life of the party and was raring to keep going.  Ah, but I had to run in the morning...errr...afternoon.  In 30 degree celsius weather.

I feel fat and out of shape

It's time to get it together!  I took an almost two week hiatus from running due to having the flu and then a terrible cold.  I'm still not 100%, but I'm good enough to get back into it. 
I was supposed to do my 9 mile run yesterday, but I was far too hungover wasn't quite feeling it, so I opted to postpone it until Sunday.  This run was hard.  Mainly because it was my first run getting back into it.

A Gargantuan Flash Fiction

It's Flash Fiction time again.  I'm still not sure if I'm doing it right, but at least I AM doing it!  This week's challenge was 'Gargantuan' and 500 words.  The deadline is today.  I started this an hour ago so it won't be the greatest, but it is at least done and I won't have to send postcards (the consequence of not finishing)!!!
Aaaaahhhhhhhhhhh......what is going on with me?  These past two weeks have completely sucked.  I completed by 11 mile run last Friday evening and then took the rest of the weekend off.  Monday was a holiday here in Alberta, so I thought I would be super extra nice to myself and give myself that day off as well (truth is, I had to make a Caesar for my post on Monday and I kind of drank a few and got drunk....oops).  Tuesday I was pressed for time and only had 20 minutes to run.  It all went to hell from there.  Wednesday I came down with the flu/cold from hell and I haven't had the energy or desire to step on my treadmill since.
Tomorrow morning I have a 12 mile run scheduled.  I think for the sake of my lungs, I'll postpone until Sunday.

The Caesar - by BitchyD

The best part about doing my long run on Friday night was having the rest of the weekend to totally relax and partake in the drinking of the alcohol!  This weekend I chose to bask in the glory of my Caesars!
I had promised that I would post my most favorite Caesar recipe quite some time ago and then I completely forgot (and none of you assholes reminded me).  I have a few recipes that I thoroughly enjoy, but after my friend Randa with The Bewitchin' Kitchen passed on some Caesar ingredients for me to try and review, my absolute favorite is now this:

Drinking > Running

Ugh...what a week.  Not a good week.  A very drunk week instead.  I've been dealing with a lot of personal things lately and this week it all really affected me.
Monday: Supposed to swim.  Partner couldn't go.  Drank wine instead.

Operation Hot Husband

On Tuesday, I had a fast and short (3 miles) run scheduled.  I was only able to run 0.8 miles until I had to stop due to my gag reflex getting the best of me.  Here's what went down (from the beginning):
I've been hassling my husband to get his ass into the gym for quite some time now.  He's attempted working out a few times, but never knows what to do so he quits.  I've tried setting him up with a personal trainer and he did go a few times, but he quit as he felt he didn't have time to go.  He also didn't even really attempt to complete the assigned work- outs on his own.